December 2010

Pillow Pets: For The Nascent Furry In Your Life

It's a stupid pillow!  It's a stupid pet!  It's a stupid Pillow Pet!  This year's inescapable holiday infomercial and product is the Pillow Pet, and its many knock-offs.

The idea behind the Pillow Pet is two-fold:  First, that you want to have a stuffed animal with a vertical orientation.  And second, that you do not want to use a stuffed animal for a pillow (because of its vertical orientation).  Can you see the "stupid" part yet? 

There is no reason on God's green Earth why you should have a convertible stuffed animal/pillow.  All you're doing is cinching the stuffed animal in the middle.  This product literally has no reason to exist.  And yet, kids are going insane for it.

FlavorWave: Mr. T's Favorite Way To Greeyo

Oh Mr. T, though you have aged along with the rest of us since your television heights of the 1980s, the twinkle in your eye remains undiminished.  The other morning as I flipped through the channels, I spied Mr. T talking about his favorite "greeyo."  It took a moment before I was able to translate this correctly, as the Mr. T-ese version of "grill."

Said greeyo is the FlavorWave Turbo, a peculiar kitchen instrument which is not quite an oven, not quite a microwave, not quite a steamer, but a little of all three. 

Cami Secret: An Aftermarket Boob Apron

Has this ever happened to you?  Really?  It has?  Then you know what?  YOU SHOULD NOT WEAR THAT SHIRT.

The premise of Cami Secret is as follows:
1.  You have a low-cut shirt.
2.  Inexplicably, you want to wear it to work.  NO OTHER SHIRT WILL DO.
3.  You lack a camisole, thin t-shirt, tank top, or any other thing you can wear as a layer to cover your cleavage.

Maybe this is a thing that happens to people.  It has never happened to me.  But admittedly, I am not a fashion maven.